Goldstein in '08. A General Erection.
Why he's running:
Everyone knows politics is a dirty business. Who better to run than a veteran of an even dirtier business?

Putting the Vice in President
Possible mates include Jenna Jameson, Larry Flynt, and Triumph the dog from Conan, who is often mistaken for Al. Al will also be seeking a Sixth Lady. Wives one through five had no comment. Nor did sex partners 1-7000.

- Removing the "o" from country
- Universal AL-Care, which will provide daily government subsidized cunnilingus for women, and a damn good cigar for every male citizen
- Will continue to hate George and love bush
- Will try his famed tongue on Nancy's Pelosi.

Pornographer, author, champion of the first amendment, and very dirty old man, he's our own little weapon of mass destruction. Put Al in office, if only to see Dick Cheney crap his pants.

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